One of the local radio stations here changed its format for the new year. The music is still the same – a mix of rock and alternative. The change has come in the form of radio talk shows. The majority of the day is filled with them. There’s a typical morning drive time show, and a mid-day group consisting of two “regular” guys and a token hot chick, who engage in mostly meaningless banter filled with double entendres and jokes about sex. I’ve caught a few minutes here and there of these shows, mostly while channel surfing. I hear these people and they are so ridiculous – but I keep listening. It’s kind of like watching the dorky kid in high school doing a dance routine at the talent show, a la Napoleon Dynamite. You aren’t expecting a great show or anything, but the mere fact that he has his skinny ass up there is enough to intrigue you. The guy who hasn’t spoken more than two words since freshman year is gonna bust moves while lip-synching “Maniac?” I am sooo there.
Similarly, I have made the mistake of listening to the evening talk show airing in the new format. This show is different from the others in that it’s a one-dude show. I’d name the guy and link to him, but I just can’t bring myself to do it. Simply put, this Talk Show Host is an asshole. His whole “game” is to cater to men, mostly younger guys. That’s nothing new. But his angle is crap. His angle is: women are bitches, sluts, and gold diggers. (His words.) Do whatever you can to get laid and then dump them. Don’t ever get married, because there’s nothing in it for you. She’ll nag and smother you, and then probably cheat and go after everything you have.
This guy is incredibly narcissistic. He admits that he is in the business for the money, he doesn’t care what people think, and that he’s only saying how most men, if not all, feel. The morons that call in to the show call him “dad” or “father,” saying how Talk Show Host has changed their lives. How yeah, they used to treat women with some respect, but Talk Show Host has shown them the error of their ways. Now they understand just how really stupid women are, and they’re happy about this because this makes it easier to get them into bed.
Yesterday’s show was even more disturbing than usual. A 23-year-old guy called in, saying, “Father, I have a story to tell you.” Like it’s motherfucking confession time at St. Mary’s. Dipshit. The guy goes on to tell his story, about how he goes out every night with his buddies, trying to meet chicks to bring home and have sex with. A few months ago he succeeded in bringing a woman home, and they had sex several times through the course of the night. He tells Talk Show Host, “We were both wasted. The first couple of times I used a rubber, but….” Need I go on here? Long story short, this guy got the girl pregnant. She is now at the end of her first trimester.
Dipshit says, “Father, she wants to keep the baby. I don’t want a kid. She won’t get an abortion or anything. She says she won’t make me pay child support if I’m a part of the kid’s life. But I don’t want to be a part of the kid’s life. I’ve never wanted kids. I don’t know what to do.”
Talk Show Host goes into a lecture about how Dipshit should have known better than to bring a chick to his house. “They can always track you down that way,” he says. Then he moves on to the matter at hand:
“You could always invite her over for some cocktails and a dip in the Jacuzzi. Pregnant women aren’t supposed to go in hot tubs or drink. Not that you would do that [wink, wink]. I mean, god only knows what could happen if she got in the hot tub or drank some alcohol. Theoretically speaking, of course. Not that you would ever do that or I would ever suggest such a thing [wink, wink].”
“Well that’s a good theory to know. Not that I would ever do anything like that, you know.” Dipshit catches on quickly.
“Yeah, because that would be WRONG. You would never do something like that. That could jeopardize her pregnancy [wink, wink].”
So I’m driving in my car, listening to this miserable excuse for a man. Why? Because I’m infuriated and keep getting shocked by what Talk Show Host and his listeners are saying. I realize this is exactly the point; to keep me listening. But this asswipe is “suggesting” (wink, wink) that this guy try to induce a miscarriage.
Let me break this down: Talk Show Host’s two pieces of advice were to 1) never bring a chick to your house to have sex with; and 2) not invite a pregnant woman into a hot tub or offer her alcohol because that would be WRONG.
WRONG is teaching men that women are objects for sex, and are useless in every other way. WRONG is lamely veiling your advice to induce an abortion as a “theory.”
WRONG is not calling this dude on the fact that he didn’t wear a condom the entire time.
WRONG is calling some Talk Show Host “father” because he preaches crap and irresponsibility and you can’t think for your damn self.
WRONG IS ME LISTENING TO THIS CRAP.
Ooh that miserable excuse for a man would have had a STRONGLY worded email from me at the very least if not a phone call into both him and his station boss! What an asshole.
BTW, Hi Michele sent me!
Posted by: Melanie | Thursday, January 26, 2006 at 09:45 AM