Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen songs that would seriously make me yearn for Chinese water torture, if played on a continuous loop:

1. "Foolish Beat" - Debbie Gibson:  Oh, excuse me:  Deborah Gibson.  The name change totally tricks us into forgetting her 80's teeny bopper days.
2. "Locomotion" - Kylie Minogue:  I'm having flashbacks of the video:  something about a spandex jumper, slouch socks and a side ponytail?
3. "My Immortal" - Evanessence:  I actually like this song, but the depressive factor is wayyy up there.
4. "Kokomo" - The Beach Boys:  Have I mentioned this one before?  I'm sorry.
5. "It's A Heartache" - Bonnie Tyler:  Forget the heartache.  Her voice gives me a headache.  But, whatever.
6. "Cheeseburger In Paradise" - Jimmy Buffet:  Wuh?
7. "I'll Be Loving You Forever" - New Kids On The Block:  Oh, man.  I have no words.
8. "Macarena" - Los Del Rio:  I had to Google this one to find out the name of the rat bastards that tortured the country for what seemed like infinity plus one.  And don't even MENTION the dance.
9. "For Your Eyes Only" - Sheena Easton:  Just:  BLECHH.  Pretty much anything this little priss sang gets my gag reflex going, kind of like the eating segments on "Fear Factor."
10. "Mandy" - Barry Manilow:  The musical version of "Old Yeller." 
11. "Mmm Bop" - Hanson:  There seems to be a correlation between the popularity of this song and frontal lobotomies back in 1997.
12. "You Light Up My Life" - Debbie Boone:  Ha! Innocent my ass.  Does she really expect us to believe she was singing about THE LORD??  I prefer the parody: "You... light up my pipe, you give me dope... to carry onnnnnn..."
13. "Ain't Nobody Humpin' Around" - Bobby Brown:  Just try to convince me that this dude's not a total headcase.

Suddenly?  I'm in a very foul mood.

Comments

[vanessa]

Great list. I agree with all of them. I think they were recorded with subliminal messages imbedded in them. That's why they were able to hit the charts.

[jege]

What, no Hall & Oates?

And FUCK "Kokomo". Fuck it right in the ass. Jesus Christ on a stick, do I HATE that song. Also, "Is this love" by Whitesnake. *shudder*